A native New Yorker, Ama Gyamerah currently lives in California where she works in the film industry. With parents from Ghana and a network of women from the African diaspora, Ama formed a strong identity as a young girl of color before she was even in high school. On this episode, she talks about the shock to her system that was adulthood. Having attended an all-girls’ high school in East Harlem where everyone looked like her and believed in her, she didn’t quite know how to navigate the assumptions made about her once she went to a predominantly white university in a town that didn’t mirror the diversity of New York City. She shares micro-aggressions endured at the hands of white roommates and overt racist vitriol spewed on social media platforms during the height of the Black Lives Matter movement. Post-college, she was confronted with the reality of bills and entry level jobs that didn’t always cover all those bills. It was through these brand new traumatic experiences that Ama learned the true meaning of self-care. She began to practice the skill of pulling back from “the struggle” when said struggle was draining. Instead of always being in warrior mode, she learned to pour into herself. Because Ama’s older sister is a strong proponent of utilizing mental health services, Ama was also able to access consistent therapy. Because her mother and the other women who raised her had deeply entrenched West African values, the idea of having any other comfort for mental anguish outside of God was unfamiliar to her. She credits her sister’s wisdom and worldliness for exposing her to such a life-transformative resource. When Ama reflects on a narrative about Black womanhood she has come to challenge, it is the belief that Black women always have to be strong. She has always been a very emotional and sensitive person and grew up hearing that she needed to toughen up. “I don’t think it’s true that being sensitive and emotional are weaknesses,” she says. “I feel deeply and am not strong in the way people think Black women are supposed to be. I think vulnerability is important and doesn’t need to be corrected.”
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